Houston Forward Times

04 December 2013 Written by  Jeffrey L. Boney


picture-8-400x237You know it trips me out, the way people act when they feel they have a little money or a little status. I mean they come across all high and mighty; acting like they are all powerful and on top of the world.

 C’mon, you know that you know them!

They judge you by the clothes that you wear or the amount of money that you make or the kind of car that you drive or the size home you live in. 

As I said, you know that you know them!

These are the folks who think that they are really ballin’ out of control, because you see them driving a drop top Mercedes Benz and they see you driving a Hyundai Sonata.

These are the folks who think they’ve arrived because they have a 8,000 square foot house on the golf course in the suburbs, compared to your 1,700 square foot house in an urban area.

These are the folks who look down on you for shopping at Fiesta and Foodarama, when they shop at Randall’s and Aldi.

I could go on and on and on with examples; but you get my point.

The primary thing that I want to emphasize is the fact that everything is relative, and it’s only a matter of perspective as to how you look at things in life.

For the person who chose to buy a Hyundai Sonata versus a Mercedes Benz, more than likely, that person actually saved money. 

For the person who bought the 1,700 square ft. house versus the 8,000 square ft. house, more than likely, that person saved money. 

I have a couple of questions though. 

If the person who bought the Hyundai Sonata spent $60k less than the person who bought the Mercedes Benz, aren’t they in a better position financially?

What about this one…..isn’t the person who has no mortgage on their 1,700 square ft. home in a better position than the person who owns the 8,400 square ft. home, with a major note left on their house?

I will leave that up to you to decide, but at the end of the day, it’s all relative.

Young people join gangs because they want to feel as if they are a part of a family or to experience a sense of camaraderie. Most of the activities and dealings attributed to gang life, are centered on having a so-called territory or “set”.  The thing that is most interesting though is that these gangs claim a “set” or streets or neighborhoods that they technically don’t own. You know darn well, that if the cops show up on the scene, almost every one of these so-called gangstas will run away like some scared coward. Those who don’t run will be told to leave and get off the “set” and there is nothing they can do about it.  Their power is only relative within the circle they are a part of.  You see, in the gang, the members of the gang who claim to control the “set” don’t really have any real power at all to control anything. They are controlled by a level of authority that is greater than theirs.  It’s all relative, you feel me?

The same thing rings true in politics. President Obama has the most powerful position in the world, but he can’t get a lot of his initiatives implemented or nominees confirmed because much of his power is only relative because of the way his position is set up. As president, he can only sign bills into law; he can’t originate or pass them. The gridlock in Washington has limited his ability to do what he wants, in spite of his pleas and threats.  His power is only relative.

What about your job or career? You could be the best and the brightest in your career, but your ability to get promotions and advance in your company is based on someone else overseeing you and they are the ones with the decision making power. Again, everything is relative.

See what you need to do for real is expand your mind. Once you realize that the circle you’re apart of is so much smaller than the many other circles that exist, I promise you that you’ll soar.

What good is it for you to dominate your usual circle, when that circle isn’t as powerful as you believe it is. There is always going to be someone who has more than you have or is operating at an entirely different level than you have ever experienced before in your life.

You may have a nice beach house on Galveston Island, but it’s not on the beach in the Bahamas.

Please don’t allow the dominance you experience in your played out and self-centered circle, lead you to believe you’ve arrived.  Remember, there is always another level to get to and the same folks that you see going up, will be the same folks you see coming down. 

My main point is; there is nothing wrong with believing the very best about yourself; that’s a good thing and not a bad thing at all. However, when you start believing your own hype and start flossin’ around like you’re so much better than everybody else because you got a lil’ money; a lil’ status; or a lil’ position; slow down kin folk and realize that your reality is only relative. Relax!

Jeffrey L. Boney serves as Associate Editor and is an award-winning journalist for the Houston Forward Times newspaper.  Jeffrey is a Next Generation Project Fellow, dynamic, international speaker, experienced entrepreneur, business development strategist and Founder/CEO of the Texas Business Alliance.  If you would like to request Jeffrey as a speaker, you can reach him at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .

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